I most likely went into labor on November 11, 2010, Veterans Day, at 37 weeks and 5 days pregnant (side note: by my own calculations, I was probably more like 39 weeks pregnant, which is what the OB measured my belly at a few days prior). I remember tossing and turning the night before, unable to get comfortable and sleep for more than an hour at a time. I woke up every hour like I had for a weeks leading up to that point. Thankfully, I was always able to fall back asleep easily.
Drew was off work that Thursday due to the federal holiday. He had various appointments scheduled throughout the day – the dentist, doctor and dermatologist- that he wanted to get out of the way before the baby arrived in a couple weeks (he was sure she'd be late). I started the day by walking the dog for 2 miles, like I had done every other day that week.
Crampy, tired and feeling overall just out of it, I decided to accompany Drew to his appointments. I should have recognized this as a sign that something was coming since I normally would think of a million other things to do besides sitting around waiting for him. But something told me to stay close and not let him out of my sight for too long. I felt especially huge and uncomfortable sitting and waiting at the dermatologist. I couldn’t stay seated for more than several minutes at a time without needing to walk around.
After the appointment Drew took me to the mall to pick up a few extra items (including a blue maternity velour track suit that I planned to live in the for next 2 weeks - I was huge) for my hospital bag which I packed that morning. He accidently parked across the entire mall from where we needed to shop so we did a lot of walking. I remember not feeling great. Again, this should have been a red flag for me. It had been about a week since I went from loving every minute of the pregnancy to feeling like I was ready for it to be over. We ate pizza and ice cream that night before I crashed in bed. Looking back, I was probably in labor all day.
“Um Drew, I think my water broke. Yea, my water broke” – this is how Drew woke up on Friday, November 12, a day he planned to be at work. “Huh?” he asked. I repeated myself, getting more excited each time, until it registered to him. Drew knew exactly what to do. First he went downstairs and opened a pack of Clara’s diapers to help me out – a tip we learned from our birthing class instructor. Then he called my doctor. We were given orders to come to the hospital stat- they didn’t even want me to shower. Thankfully my bag was packed. We threw a few things in a bag for Drew, fed and let Gia out, called our parents, and made it to the hospital in under an hour. By 6 a.m. I was lying in a hospital bed feeling great and ready to get the show on the road.
Once it was confirmed by a test that my water was in fact broken and that my contractions were 2 mins apart, I was officially admitted, changed into a robe and gown that I had packed, and Drew and I began waking the halls of Labor and Delivery. My OB was not on call during the day so another OB checked in on me later that morning. About 1.5 cm dilated, fully effaced and the baby being in somewhat of a dropped head down position, the doctor was happy with my contractions and said I was good to labor on my own without any medical intervention. Since I didn’t have an epidural, I was free to move around as I pleased for the most part but had to get back on the fetal monitor at least once an hour to make sure the baby was doing well. I loved the freedom of not being in the bed and moved around as much as I could.
Hours passed and I was still feeling great – which apparently is not a good thing when you are in labor. The OB on call decided that while my contractions looked great on paper, the fact that I was feeling so good most likely meant that they were not doing their job. Drew’s parents and brother had arrived by this point with the video camera in tow. We had fun being dramatic for the camera, but in reality I was feeling none of the excruciating pain you see in movies. So we started the pitocin (pit). As it increased, so did the pain. I was visibly uncomfortable by the time my parents and sister arrived a couple hours later.
The remainder of Friday was spent increasing and decreasing my pit, trying to find the magic spot to make my contractions productive. At multiple points I was given the maximum pit a person can receive. On several occasions my contractions were only seconds apart, which carries the risk of causing the baby distress. When this happened we took a break from the pit. I never received an epidural during this time. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being the highest most unbearable pain, I was at about a 7 when lying down and about a 2-3 when rocking in the chair, bouncing on my medicine ball or moving around.
My OB, Monica, came in to check me sometime late that afternoon. We got very lucky that she was on call Friday night/Saturday morning. Having made very little progress (I was now at 2 cm) since the last time I was checked, she decided to break my water even more. She recommended I get an epidural but I chose not to. I continued to labor and Drew did everything he could to help make me comfortable, from rubbing my feet, to sitting with me while I bounced and rocked. Our families went to our house for the night and we promised to call if we had any news. It was looking more and more like a Saturday birth was the new plan.
As I labored on throughout the night, my contractions were getting closer and closer together and lasted for a long time. Monica and the nurses were concerned that I was getting no break or rest and that the baby could go into distress. While Clara never had any issues with the pit, they made a decision to take me off of it sometime during the middle of the night. By this time Drew and I were completely exhausted. It had been 20+ hours of labor, hardly any progress and emotions were running high. We each took a shower to try and relax but it did not help me. In my mind, I was just inching closer and closer to the c-section I strongly did not want.
Although I was clear that I did not want any pain medication during my labor, I finally gave in around 4 a.m. and agreed to take something to relax. At this point Monica came in to tell me that I had been in labor and my water had been broken for over 24 hours. I could continue laboring for another 24 hours but hardly any progress had been made and it was nearing time to get the baby out. Drew and the nurse knew I didn’t want a c-section and encouraged me to keep going. I was exhausted, completely worn out from the intense laboring brought on by the pitocin, and I knew it was time. I honestly felt like I had done as much as I could and now I needed help.
Monica was nearing the end of her shift but agreed to sleep for a few hours and stay on longer so she could do my c-section. This put me at ease because she is a phenomenal OB - nice, funny, super sharp, and definitely the Dr. you want doing your c-section.
After I made the decision for the c-section, I was finally able to relax (with the help of medicine). Drew and I called our families to tell them to come to the hospital, he painted my nails, and we took a quick nap. Our families arrived to wish us well, Drew changed into his scrubs (which he saved for painting), I was finally given an epidural (which was nothing after everything I had been through) and off we went into the OR.
I was never nervous during the c-section. I was able to move my feet and had some feeling in my legs so we realized pretty quickly that the epidural had not fully taken and I was given morphine. I felt some pain, tugging and pulling, but Monica told funny stories and talked with me the entire time. It seemed like just a few minutes had gone by when I heard Clara’s cry and they held her up for Drew and I to see. (Drew videotaped the entire birth but would not look anywhere beyond the curtain). I was so surprised at how much Clara looked like me. Drew was shocked at how big she looked, especially considering she was 2 weeks early and had such a small house to grown in! She was such a beautiful little newborn – perfect skin, fat cheeks, big head. She was given a 9 on the apgar scale and we were told her weight was 7 lbs. 8 ½ oz, 20 inches long. Her head was 14.5, which Monica said was big for me to have tried to birth. It ended up that Clara’s perfect little head was the issue and the fact that it was so perfect and beautiful meant that it likely never entered the birth canal.
Clara lay quietly while they cleaned her up and warmed her under the light. Drew and I just stared at her in shock and amazement. All I wanted to do was hold her and inspect her. I imagine this is what every new mother must feel. Never anticipating that a c-section would be our fate, the first few moments after birth were something I was looking so forward to. If I had it my way, I would have been one of those women that pulled their baby out themselves, immediately hugged her to my chest and let her figure out how to breastfeed – before anyone else touched her.
Clara and Drew left the OR about 10 minutes after she was born. Clara was off for a quick stop in the nursery and Drew went to the waiting room to give our parents the good news. He found them already hovering around the nursery glass, trying to figure out if the new baby brought in there was Clara. My mom even called the nursery from the waiting room to ask if it was Baby Christopher. Monica put the final touches on me and a very drugged Amanda was wheeled back to my labor and delivery room where Drew was waiting for me.
Most people would end the birth story here but not us!
The nurses knew my desire to begin skin to skin and breastfeed as soon as possible. God bless my labor and delivery nurses and the lactation consultants. Clara is still exclusively breastfed (in addition to solids) at 8 months and I don’t believe this would be the case, especially given the c-section, medication I was given during the surgery and post partum complications I encountered, if it were not for the amazing support I was given in the initial hours after birth.
Clara was handed to me about 30 minutes after we returned to the labor and delivery room. It was an amazing moment. She was placed naked on my chest and we dozed off to sleep together – peaceful and in love. I am so very grateful for this, although the snooze did not last long.
I ended up having a “mini hemorrhage”. No blood transfusion necessary – thank goodness. Just another 24 hours on pit and other extra measures taken to avoid serious blood clots. The lesson in all of this was that pitocin was not for me. The hemorrhage was most likely caused by being on pit for so long. But then it was also my saving grace because it helped stop the hemorrhage. Lesson learned, no pitocin for me, ever again.
Clara spent the night with Drew and I in our nice labor & delivery room – keeping these 4 star digs was one upside of having a post-delivery complication. Another was the lovely sponge bath the nurse gave me Sunday morning after I was finally able to say adios to the iv. Clara had her beautiful hospital pics taken and we were finally downgraded to a recovery room. I was sad to say goodbye to the labor and delivery nurses – we had been through so much with them. It turned out that the recovery nurses didn’t even compare. Our families were still in town and spent time holding Clara and helping us move. My feet were extremely swollen from the pitocin/iv but I was able to walk normally and no longer looked anywhere near pregnant. I weighed myself and I had lost 22 lbs in the last 24 hours.
We had a nice visit with friends, said goodbye to our families, and resumed our efforts to breastfeed. Despite being heavily sedated in the beginning, Clara and I had success breastfeeding from day one. It took weeks for us to perfect it but I owe this to the help of the lactation consultants, my commitment to making it work, Drew’s incredible support and keeping to my strict schedule of nursing her every 2 hours, day and night, for the first few weeks. It was harder than I ever thought possible, but we got through it and are 100% happy with the outcome of our efforts.
By the time Sunday evening rolled around, a very exhausted Drew decided to take his temperature to make sure the chills he was feeling were not from a fever. He confirmed our worst fears that he did in fact have a high fever, and immediately left to go home and get better. The last thing we needed was for Clara or I to get sick. Around the same time Drew had to say goodbye to us, the most frigid nurse showed up to take care of us. She informed me that neither Clara nor I were allowed to leave the room for fear that we might get others sick. Clara was not allowed to go to the nursery. This is where I lost it. I had slept about 3 hours in the last 48 hours + everything I had gone through + it was painful to even get out of bed – how was I going to take sole care of her?! Grandma to the rescue. I would not have survived the next 36 hours without the help of my mom-in-law. She stayed with Clara and I the entire time and was an amazing help.
Sometime soon after Drew left, a new, nicer nurse, discovered my blood pressure had sky rocketed. I still was not sleeping and my hormones + Drew leaving had left me a basket case. When Drew returned Tuesday morning, healthy and ready to take us home, I have never been happier to see someone in my life. We were discharged late that rainy morning. We had the room packed up in about 2 minutes flat after we found out we were finally getting out of there.
Despite some hiccups with delivery and post delivery, we were leaving the hospital with a healthy, strong, beautiful baby girl. We were completely exhausted, yet had never been happier.
I will never forget how great it felt to walk into our house for the first time with her. I immediately took a nap while Drew and his mom had Clara try out her swing for the first time. His mom left a couple hours later and Drew and I have been on our own for the most part ever since. We both have amazing families who have helped us out immensely and we could not have done this without them.
8 months later Clara is still strong and healthy and developing just the way she should. She is happy, curious and constantly in motion. She started out looking exactly like her mom and is now daddy’s twin. She rarely takes a bottle and still prefers to be nursed. She is the love of our lives and we cannot imagine it without her. Everything I went through was completely worth it and I would do it all over again.
Pics: https://picasaweb.google.com/115625325435932605281/ClaraSBirth?authkey=Gv1sRgCKDokcLFpsSdew
